Nutrition and Health
The final word on nutrition and health.
1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the English.
2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the English.
3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the English.
4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the English.
5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than the English.
CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it’s a bad one.
Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither of them are hurt.
After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, ‘So you’re a man, that’s interesting.
I’m a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There’s nothing left, but fortunately we are unharmed.
This must be a sign that we should meet and be friends, and live together in peace for the rest of our days.’
The man replied, ‘I agree with you completely. This must be a sign!’
The woman continued, ‘And look at this, here’s another miracle.
My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn’t break.
Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.’
Then she hands the bottle to the man.
The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.
The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.
The man asks, ‘Aren’t you having any?’
The woman replies, ‘No. I think I’ll just wait for the police.’